Life

I returned home from Louisiana yesterday after spending about 10 days with my dad helping him with some medical issues. This is the first time I had to face directly his aging process and it has created a deep sorrow in my heart. I have had my issues with my dad as anyone has with a parent, but somehow they all seem very small as I face the prospect of his continued deterioration and eventual death. It causes me to face my own mortality as well and to image what life will be like without my parents. I am grateful to have a spiritual foundation through which to see this facet of life. I grieve from the human perspective and at the same time, I give thanks for the presence of Spirit and life. I feel deep humility, sadness, love, tenderness and grief all at the same time. This is what it means to be a spiritual being having a human experience.

Unity world wide

I am currently in Louisiana taking care of some medical issues for my dad and was able to go to Unity of Baton Rouge this morning. It is wonderful to be able to walk into a Unity church in other parts of the country and hear this incredible message and get my spirit fed. There are groups of people just like ours all over the world working together to create places where people grow spiritually in order to assist with the world's awakening. I miss my church when I am not there and at the same time am grateful for the incredible group of people that are there sharing themselves and creating a sacred experience for everyone.

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving. As I sit here in my living room with my fire going cozy on a wet gray day, my heart is full of gratitude. Michael is flying home after a great trip in Florida with my step-daughter and as I survey all of this, I am in awe of God's grace pulsing through my life. Today has been a different Thanksgiving for me. It is probably the first one I can ever think of that I basically spent alone. I have spent time meditating, reflecting and cultivating a spirit of gratitude and feel at peace. I have had 2 wonderful simple, vegan meals today and my body feels great. I have lots of energy and focus and I am sleeping well. More than anything, I feel congruent between my meal choices and what I want to stand for in my life.

Last night Dale Worley treated our congregation to one of his AWE worship experiences. We had around 12 people who came for that and it was wonderful. He gave us his all and I saw that people were noticeably moved by it. I admire people like Dale who are willing to simply show-up and give what is theirs to give regardless of who is there and how it is received. I had to leave early because my dog had surgery the day before and I needed to get back to her.

Off to the airport to get Michael. I have taken advantage of the time alone this trip and feel refreshed and renewed. And I am really glad to get him back home with me.

Close to the edge

I came across this picture of our vacation in Canada this summer. We rode our Harley all the way around the lake. I was working my way out on the rocks to see ancient writing on the wall. That water was splashing up pretty high and rough. It reminds me of life and how we have to step out on the cliff sometimes to get the best view.

animals in the news

I find myself grieving as I go through this process. I didn't realize that meat and animal products were such an integral part of my diet and my life. Yet I feel much surer about my decision today. I am noticing animals more in the news. There was a story about 1,500 hundreds pigs or so that burned in a fire today in a single barn. I just kept thinking about how they had all of those pigs in one place and wondered if they ever saw the light of day. And now they were gone, seen as a financial loss rather than as life loss. We put stickers on our windows so fire fighters know that we have pets inside, yet when it herd animal that dies, we equate it in terms of dollars and cents.

Then there was story about how President Bush pardoned 2 turkeys. I see how we make light of the plight of these animals yet at some level that story suggests that we understand what we are doing. It is making it easier for me to choose plant based foods these past few days. I feel more connected to all living beings with my decision.

I go out to eat for the first time with my family this Friday. I am nervous and have checked into a couple of restaurants to see how they prepare certain things. I discovered that something as simple as a veggie burger actually contains animal products so it is not as easy it as it looks. But, I can keep it simple by going for the company, ordering a salad with just veggies and I can even carry something like garbanzo beans with me for added protein. There are ways of doing this and still enjoying meals with others especially meat eaters. Say a few prayers for me.

Day 3 of compassionate eating

I am going out on a limb and plan to publicly journal about my journey into veganism. This is day 3 and it is interesting to watch my thought process and what is happening to me physically. Last night, I was craving cheese in my lentils. I am committed to this so instead of reaching for the cheese left in my refrigerator (I realized that I missed it when clearing things out with my friend) I sat and thought about where the cheese came from and I realize that in order for me to have the pleasure of cheese, there was a cow who was probably on a huge farm, stuck in a barn shot full of chemicals and hormones in order to produce. When I thought of that, the craving left me. For today, I am not comfortable asking another living being to suffer in order for me to have pleasure. I realized that they were not created as the producer of my happiness. I found myself for a fleeting moment, thinking about how I often view the people in my life as objects which are there to make me happy. I see how I reduce them to things that will fulfill my needs rather than as beings that I am to love and serve. Like I said, it was fleeting but hopefully, I will be more aware of the times that I have reduced the people in my life to that. My hope is that as I make the connection between my attitude toward animals and my food and the rest of my life, and make changes so I am more congruent in all areas of my life, I will live in a more life affirming way.

Vegan eating

Ok, so it has been awhile. I love doing this, blogging that is, and yet I resist it. I wonder if anyone is reading it or if I am just writing into cyberspace. Then I have to ask, "Why am I doing it? Why do I attempt to keep a blog?" And I hope that the answer comes to because I enjoy the process, which I do and it is a discipline that feeds me and so it really doesn't matter where it goes once the words leave my mind and the keyboard. As with anything, I do it for me and let the Universe take it where it needs to go.

On a different note, We had Dr. Will Tuttle in this weekend. He challenged us to look at the assumptions that are embedded in our culture and guide our daily decisions unconsciously, particularly the one that says it is ok to eat some animals but not others. He said quite a bit more than that, but I heard that. I have been seriously considering becoming vegetarian for awhile now and have a host of reasons why I couldn't do it. But, I heard 2 things Friday evening. I heard the question about eating our pets which caused me to wonder why are some animals ok for consumption and others are not. In fact, if we try to eat dog, we would be arrested for animal cruelty. The second point that I heard was about living congruently with my principles. I value compassion and generosity. I know I could not kill the animals myself, so why would I put someone else in that position. And I am no longer willing to see living beings as commodities to be bought and sold. So, for today, I choose to be vegan. I plan to be with this decision, to practice this life style while simply observing my emotional, physical and of course spiritual process with this. This is my second day, and I already feel more at peace with myself. I have some fear about what others will think and that my decision will cause a disruption in my relationships. And what about my trip to the Caymen's in Jan ? But, I am trusting that I can make loving decisions for myself and my world and the Universe will provide.
Namaste

Who have we come here to be?

I sat back in awe this weekend as Spirit spoke in a mighty way through our collective consciousness. As a community, we spent time asking Spirit to reveal who we are to be and what is ours to do. Friday evening, powerful words like global transformation and service reverberated around the room. The hairs on my arms were standing straight up. Saturday, after much prayer, discussion and discernment, a smaller group representing the collective consciousness heard the following as our vision, "We celebrate a world expressing oneness with God-a world of peace, unity and abundance." Then we found our purpose, which is- "We are a loving spiritual community empowering active leaders in stewardship to an awakening world." The more I sit with those statements, the more excited I become. I see how we are maturing as a spiritual community moving beyond what we can get to what we can give. Even deeper than that, the word stewardship means that we feel a sense of responsibility for doing all we can to create a world of peace, unity and abundance for all. We see how God entrusted the world and one another to us and it is up to us to create the kind of world in the words of our Association, "works for everyone."

Jesus and the NRA

Yesterday as I was driving behind a truck, I noticed 2 different bumper stickers. One said, "NRA, the first line of defense." and the other was the Christian symbol of the fish. I just kept seeing the image of Jesus in the Bible reprimanding Peter for drawing a sword on his captors and standing before Pontius Pilate without a word or witness in his defense. I am also reminded of the line in the "Course in Miracles" that says, "In my defenselessness, my safety lies." Can we lay down our defenses and recognize that this is where our greatest strength lies? I think in time we will evolve to that awareness and act accordingly. In the meantime, it is up to me to see where I have built defenses in the name of protecting myself while believing that "god" has sanctioned my actions and beliefs.

I'm back

Michael and I have been in Canada riding around Lake Superior for the past 2 weeks and had an incredible time. I love going out of the country and getting a taste of what it is like to be the outsider. We take so much for granted in this country and I know that I have a tendency to believe that the rest of the world revolves around us. It is good to be reminded that other countries have just as much pride and just as much value as our own. In Unity we teach that we are all one. The only way we knew we were crossing into Canada was by the guard houses at the border where they were checking passports. An imaginary line separated us from the Canadians. I have to look at all of the other imaginary lines that I have created in my life to separate me from others making them the outsider. Going out of the country reminds me to pay attention to where I have drawn the lines and separated myself so I can erase those lines between me and another.

Life

I was stunned when I logged on and saw that the last time I blogged was June 15th or there abouts. I know that I was in California for about a week visiting with family but I look at my calendar and wonder what happened to the rest of the time. Life seems to be flying by these days and I don't want to miss anything because of the business of it all. I don't really have a solution for that other than the cliche of enjoying the moment which really does work when I can remember to do it when I am even aware that I am not doing it.

A little bit of humility

I have a confession to make. I am vain. Me, a 47 year old woman, goes to yoga and catch myself comparing how I do poses to the teenager next to me. I look to see if I can bend a little deeper, twist a little further and hold a pose a bit longer. It just goes to show me that I still have a long way to go and I have not arrived yet. When I catch myself doing those kinds of things it is my signal to shift the way I see myself and to be gentle with myself. It just doesn't feel good to compare myself nor is it loving to the other person I compare myself to.

Who can call themselves a Christian?

Recently, I was talking with an acquaintance of mine. We were talking about the symbol of the fish. She said that it stood for the belief in Jesus as the Son of God and the only way to God. I shared how I saw it very differently. I saw it as a symbol of my belief in Jesus as the spiritual master who fully evolved into the divine being that God created all of us to be. I also believe that all of the spiritual masters demonstrated the universal truth of our sacredness. She was rather insistent that it only had one meaning. I am often saddened when I hear people making God so small and confined. How could this incredible power create such diversity and richness and insist on one way? It is such an incongruency. When I think in those terms, I feel small and cut off.

I dropped the conversation because I could feel myself wanting to convince her otherwise. I know that anytime I want to convince someone, the original point gets lost and it becomes about my need to be right. I am grateful for my personal experience of God and Jesus and that if I so choose, I can display the fish calling myself a Christian. It is OK that I have a very different perspective of Christianity. I no longer have to deny myself my Christian identity simply because my perspective and experience is dramatically different from that of traditional Christianity. I follow what Jesus teaches and demonstrates to the best of my ability. I endeavor to live in a way that glorifies God by honoring the God presence in every person I meet. I usually fall short of his example, nevertheless- he is my compass and wayshower. I heard recently the term, culturally Christian, spiritually unlimited. That seems to say it all.

I love the work!

In her book "This Time I Dance" Tama Kieves says “Where you find your natural exuberance, you will find security.” That seems so counter intuitive to everything I have ever been taught. Where you find a steady paycheck, you will find security. Where you find an area with shortages, you will find security. Those are the things we are taught by well meaning people. Yet I know that I feel more secure in doing what I love than I ever did teaching. Michael and I often talk about if we will ever retire or not. I can't see myself not doing this-teaching, writing,speaking, ministering-in some way, shape or form. I feel incredibly blessed to be able to get up and do what I love to do every morning. My desire is that everyone has the same experience. The world would be an incredibly happy place if we were doing the work that we were created to do.

Tama comes on Sunday to share herself and her story with us. I love being able to bring people in to share their experience and wisdom with us. It is amazing how hearing one simple idea from someone who actually practiced it can change live. This is the best!

We did it!

I heard from the Association of Unity Churches yesterday. They emailed me to let me know that we have been granted full church status. It was an incredible feeling and at the same time, I realize that we continue to keep doing what we are doing. I have to ask myself what has really changed. I think the actual recognition is an affirmation of the process and our growth and dedication more than anything else. Not much will really change. We will continue to grow and foster our vision of creating an atmosphere of spiritual transformation. Getting full church status is the outer validation that we are living on vision and purpose.

I had someone ask me if I was floating all day. I got the email, had a rush of emotion then went on about my day. I have not really taken the time to celebrate. That is something I want to get better at. I have a better understanding that things are a process and the outer manifestation is a result of that process and yet we need to take time to celebrate our accomplishments. So that means we get to plan one heck of a party!

Full Church status

I mailed our application for full church status yesterday to the Association of Unity Churches. It felt surreal putting that in the mail. It has been an incredible process for everyone involved. We took time to celebrate our accomplishment on Sunday and it was wonderful to see how everyone that was there whether they were brand new or there from the beginning played a role in who we have become. Several people shared with me how powerful it was to see our history in action.
And we continue. We had a town meeting afterwards where we discussed areas where we would like to continue to grow and develop. A couple of the items seem to come up each time we get together making it seem that we have not made progress in those areas particularly youth ministry. This is where I have to remember that it is all a process. I know that we continue to have much work to do in order to be able to support people of all ages in their spiritual growth. Yet, I also have to remember to honor where we have come from and the progress we have made. I continue to extend the invitation to people to come forward and share their gifts in all areas of our ministry. Right now, in particular we have a call for folks who are divinely appointed to share in the areas of youth ministry, our greeters team and office assistance. We ebb and flow and nothing stays static. It is a process, it is a process, it is a process. And we continue to show up on a daily basis with the primary purpose of assisting people along their path of spiritual evolution and awakening. Yes, it is a process and a joyous one at that.

Wonderful Sunday

We hit a milestone yesterday. We had over 60 people including adults and children at church yesterday. We were able to touch 60 people with our message of love who in turn will touch the people in their lives. We truly are living our mission of experiencing God while inspiring and supporting Divine expression in all and people's lives are changing as a result.

It has been incredibly exciting over the past several months to watch as new folks discover us and begin to change their lives as they start to practice what we teach. We are in the process of applying for full church status which indicates that we are established here in Murfreesboro. It is so exciting to know that we are here providing people who don't want to completely abandon their Christian roots an alternative to traditional Christianity. It is exciting to watch as people start to realize that Jesus message was one of hope and love. They begin to see themselves and those around them as sacred. As a result I watch as people integrate this message into their lives by treating themselves and other with the reverence that is befitting of the Christed beings that they are. We just don't know it yet.

I don't know what Spirit has in mind for us as we continue our growth. I find myself excited, overwhelmed and nervous all at the same time. But, I know that we have one of the most powerfully transformative message on the planet. It is an idea whose time has come and the best I can do is suit up, show up and hold on. I am awed by the power of Spirit working through all of us and our ministry.

Grateful for Abundance

My husband and I left Sunday afternoon right after church for Panama City, FL. We were going down to meet up with some divers to get our advanced certification. We were clipping along at a pretty good pace when we had a complete blow-out. We limped our way over to the right side of the road out of traffic and called Triple A. The kind of truck my husband drives does not have a spare tire, so we had to get a room for the night and spend time the next morning locating someone with the kind of tire that goes on his car. Our plan B was to rent a car and pick up the truck on our way home.

As we sat by the interstate waiting for our tow truck, we talked about how grateful we were that we are in the financial position to make this simply an inconvenience rather than an emergency. We talked about how grateful we were for our abundance.

We talk often about abundance in Unity. We say that we deserve it and that God is an abundant God. Sometimes it feels very abstract. It is at times like this that I see how our abundance gives us a safety cushion for when life does hit. I know that money is not our source and at the same time, I am thankful that for today, we are financially blessed enough to be able to do things we love like diving along with the ability to handle the mishaps that come with life.

My desire is that everyone experiences the kind of abundance that allows them to do the things they love and to be able to take care of the inconveniences that come along. We as a ministry are here to assist people with creating that kind of abundance in their lives, whatever that may look like for each person. I again saw first hand how it is not an abstract teaching but a real nuts and bolts principle to live. I continue to stay committed to facilitating others and myself so we all can experience the abundant life that Jesus taught and modeled for us.

PS-We got the tire fixed that day, headed down to Florida, got our dives in and will be advanced certified when we get back to Murfreesboro. We now sit in a beautiful condominium right on the beach with the ocean serenading us as we settled down for the evening. God is good and I am so blessed.
Abundant blessings for all.

Where is God in all of this?

This morning, I watched with the rest of the country as events unfolded around the tragic event at Virginia Tech. My heart has been heavy all day as I think about the victims and their families as well as the young man who was driven to commit such an act. There are so many questions that we just don't have answers to. What drives someone to do this? In Unity we teach that God is absolute and that we can never separate ourselves from God and God's love. At the same time, we live in a relative world where we see separation and pain and loss. It is in this world where we see ourselves alone, disconnected and abandon. I can only imagine the deep sense of disconnect that young man must have experienced. And now, there are 32 families who are struggling with their own sense of anger, helplessness and loss. The question then becomes, "Where is God in all of this?" That is where we keep our hearts open so that God can express through us. When we feel the sorrow of this loss, we are staying connected to one another. When we open our hearts with compassion and generosity, we are allowing God to be present. The absolute principle is always present. The potential for love is never absent. It is up to us especially at a time like this for each one of us to stay true to what we teach about God's love. I have taken the time today to call and text people to let them know that they matter to me. The reports say that no one knew the young gentleman who committed this act. What if we take the time to get to know someone who is not normally on our radar? Can this simple act make a difference? I have to believe it does. I cannot do anything directly for the people in Virginia. I can hold them in my heart and honor them and our humanity with my tears and sorrow. Then, I can step out of myself and approach someone I wouldn't normally talk to and let them know that they matter. Maybe this simple act can make a difference for someone so they feel less alone and isolated. That is all I know to do with something like this.

How much good can I allow?

We showed the Secret last night and it was wonderful. We had almost 40 people there sharing the experience. During the discussion afterwards, someone made the comment that sometimes it is God's will for us to wait for our good. I heard how I have thought and said the same thing for so long. That has been a belief that I have worked with quite a bit. For a long time, I believed that God withheld things from me. It was like God teased me with a dream then said that you can't have it right now.

Today, I realize that it is not God that withholds my good, but it is me. It may be that I see a vision or have a desire and in order to allow it into my life, I must grow in some area. It may be the reason for the desire is so I will grow a particular quality or heal a limiting belief. So, if I find myself waiting for good, that is not a bad thing. But, it is not God withholding it from me either. It is like when I was in college. I had to finish the course of study before I was ready to do the work I prepared for.

It is the same thing with accepting God's gifts into our lives. It may be that we need a time of training or growth in order to be able to fully utilize the gift. The time between the initial desire and its manifestation is the time when I prepare myself to allow it. I grow in my sense of worthiness, value and capability and the Universe designs it perfectly so I can full enjoy my new abundance. Life is sweet!

Our reason for being

For whatever the reason, I have noticed the news more recently. I hear the reports on how the science on global warming has been watered down by the time it has been presented to the public. I hear how things are much worse than any of us were told. I hear how fighting continues in Iraq and about the violence here at home. I sometimes feel overwhelmed and helpless by it all wondering what we can possibly do to make a difference.

Then I see the people who come to church on Sunday and during the week for classes. I see people getting involved and working for something they believe in by offering their time, their talent and their financial support. I see how their lives are changing. I see how people are more loving in their relationships and more aware of their environment. People see themselves as the way that God gives glory to our world and in turn they see it in those around them. They change. And this change does ripple out and affect others and our world. There are so many other groups doing the same thing and we are changing the face of the planet.

It feels like a slow process and sometimes I wonder if we are making any headway at all. Then I see the reports on how individually we are making a difference in our communities and our world. My vision all along for our ministry has been to create an atmosphere where people can awaken to their splendor. My belief is while we do that, we offer that same experience and belief for others. When we recgonize how life is sacred, we become incapable of doing harmful things to each other and our world. This is how we are going to reduce the stories of war and violence and destruction and send the reporters scrambling for news because there is very little bad news anymore.

Some people say I am unrealistic, that I live in the clouds. Yet, there has to be those of us who believe in the goodness of humanity and the presence of Spirit. We hold the high watch and support each other as we do our own growth and invite others into their spiritual splendor.
Sounds like a good topic for a talk! :)

The Forgiveness Process Continues

The forgiveness process continues. Last week, I encourage our radical forgiveness class to fill out a forgiveness worksheet every day. That is operating under the assumption that someone will disappoint us at least once during the day. In my humanity, I can safely say that I will have unrealistic expectations of someone who will not fill them. As a minister, I cannot ask those in the congregation to do something that I am not willing to do. So, I have filled a sheet out every day since last Wednesday. I am amazed at how the same feelings, beliefs and patterns keep showing up no matter what the situation. It has been incredibly eye-opening for me. I knew that my beliefs colored the way I see the world. This has made it tangible in a way that I am starting to recognize it before it can grow and fester. I see much more clearly now that my experience has very little to do with what is really happening. It is all about how I see things and my perception is based on my beliefs. I have some intense grief as I see my patterns and at the same time, I experience great feelings of expansiveness and awareness of my connection to humanity. I am eager to see what will happen after 49 days of this practice. Stay tuned.

Radical Forgiveness

We started a radical forgiveness class last Wednesday night. When we think of forgiveness, we often see that we were the victim and someone else is the victimizer. We forgive the other person because we realize that they acted out of their own sense of pain and woundedness. This method of forgiveness has worked for many of us for a long time. Colin Tipping is encouraging us to go deeper with the concept of forgiveness and entertain the thought that there is no victim or victimizer. On some level we agreed to this particular dance in order to assist each other with our individual healing. It doesn't mean that I condone bad behavior, what it means is that I see that I created and participated in the situation at some level. I found myself resisting this idea. It is not new to me, Unity teaches that our perception creates our reality. I just never have given it as much thought as I am as I facilitate this class. This past week, I saw how insidious the victim consciousness runs through me. I saw how I can take anything personal or make it about me. I don't know if I orchestrated the situations more than I interpret them in that way because of the filter through which I continue to see the world. This does not mean that I beat up on myself for not arriving at enlightenment yet. It means that I stay aware and honor the emotions around it while releasing the need to be a victim in my world. As a result, I am already experiencing a deeper sense of appreciation for life and a belief that the Universe is here to support me as I continue to live my mission. I know this for myself and others as well. That is why is it called radical forgiveness-I see that I have a choice at any point to engage with an event or person differently simply by changing the way I see them and myself. Share your comments about your process of forgiveness as we all travel this human journey together. Go to www.radicalforgiveness.com for more information about the program we are using.

Welcome new board

Yesterday we dedicated our new board after our weekend retreat. It was an exciting and bittersweet moment. We have had a stable board for the last 3 years and each one of those board members have stepped down for a variety of reasons over the past four months. Their lives have changed and have gotten full. This is what church is for. We are here to help people grow and mature so they can pursue their passions. We are also here to support people with having fulfilling healthy relationships. This has been the gift for each board member. I am excited for them and at the same time, I am deeply sad. I have gotten to be close with each one and have come to see them as a friend. As with any relationship, the nature changes. Yet, knowing that does not always take the sadness away. For that, I let my tears fall and let God massage my heart. At the same time, I make room in my heart for three new board members. I often wonder if I should learn to distance myself from people in church. People come, get what they need to grow and many times they leave to pursue new paths. Each time, when it is someone I have gotten close to, I grieve. Yet, I think my ability to be vulnerable and available is what makes me a good minister. Regardless, it is who I am and I don't know that I can change it. So, I say good by and bless the board members who have served us well while welcoming with excitment and appreciation our newest board members. And so the cycle of life continues.

The Secret on CBS Sunday Morning

CBS Sunday Morning news show featured the "Secret" as its lead report. They talked about how a number of people had different opinions about the "Secret" showing the bottom line which is that the movie and its ideas are helping people live better lives. One woman said that it is helping her to be more positive about her life. Unity has been teaching the principles presented in the "Secret" for over 100 years and salong with much more. The "Secret" is entry level New Thought and it is exciting to see it in the mainstream. I also get excited when I see people going beyond simply wanting "the stuff" to wanting to see how they can make a difference in the lives of others. When it comes down to it deep down all we really want is to know is that we matter and we can make a difference in our world. We are having a second showing of the "Secret" Friday, April 13th which will be followed by a discussion. I am also excited about the workshop we are sponsoring Sunday, April 15th with Karen Cressman on the laws of attraction. That will give us a chance to see how we can apply these principles in a way that blesses ourselves and others all at the same time.